Monthly Archives: December 2013

An Update Before We Start the New Year!

I pray that you have all been blessed throughout the year, and that healing is taking place in your hearts and the hearts of your children. I was reminded very recently that I needed to go back and read my own post, “Parenting According to Emotional Age!”  🙂 We have been moving right along with Sweetie 4, as this was… (more…)

Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas to ALL! Decorating cookies. 🙂

A Milestone

Today, as I type this, it is totally silent in my home. WHY? Because all 4 of my girls are not at home right now. One is still in school and the other 3 went to a dog training event and then a Christmas Party/ Christmas Sock exchange! And you know what? I’m not worried. They are having  a wonderful… (more…)

Problems or Solutions?

When we are working through adjustments with our children, how we view the task at hand can be a deciding factor in our success! Are we blinded by all of the problems, focusing in on the negative ?  Or do we see those problems as stepping stones towards something beautiful  while seeking a positive solution? In the midst of storms… (more…)

Memory Making

Making memories together is a great way to help our children form stronger bonds of attachment with their new family. For a child newly home, the only memories they have of this year’s Holiday Celebrations , are LAST years, and those memories won’t be with your family, and can be quite traumatic. The good news is, that if we work… (more…)

A Sweetie 4 Update

I have given regular updates on our newest Sweetie since she came home in March of 2011. I wanted to update once again. Sweetie 4 is adorable!  She is doing fantastic and amazes me with her strength! In the last almost 3 years, she has grown and has gone from the shortest to the tallest! She is almost 5 foot… (more…)

Tools For Coping Part 2

I wrote yesterday about tools for coping…. Today I will add to our tool box! When the sweeties were little, I created a “tool box” for them. They would take their hand up to the forehead and open their head. We’d put tools in there…. We chose: 1. The tell the truth tool! 2. The kindness tool! 3. The listen… (more…)

Tools For Coping

I wrote in my last post that I was going to discuss different tools that have helped our children cope behaviors that are most likely due to past trauma and neglect. 1. Permission to have a quiet place. Holidays can be very stressful and fearful for some children.  They may be masking it on the outside really well, but underneath… (more…)

Memories and The Sense of Smell

Today, Sweetie 4 and I went grocery shopping at Sprouts Super Market.  They have this little area for tasting coffee.  They had a flavored coffee “Texas Pecan”, and I wanted to just taste it.  So I did. INSTANTLY, and I DO MEAN INSTANTLY, a memory popped into my head from 25 years ago! My memory  was of Mike and I… (more…)

So You Are Moving To…..

Tonight I was standing by the Fireplace and Sweetie 1 came up and gave me a big hug! We were adoring each other and I pushed her hair back affectionately and said, “So, you are moving…”  and I didn’t finish the sentence. Her countenance went from adoring to FEAR! And I finished the sentence…. “Into Sweetie 2’s room after Christmas!”… (more…)


Our Support Group is going to go through Karyn Purvis’s book, “The Connected Child” once again.  I have been through this book 4 times now, and I am amazed at how much I glean from reading, every time! The First Chapter was perfect for this week. Sweetie 4 has been bouncing back and forth between old trauma behaviors and everyday,… (more…)

Ice Storm

We had a pretty good ice storm yesterday and today.  Sweetie 2 woke up as always and made the coffee. As soon as she was finished, the electricity went out! So thankful for warm coffee! It came back on about 5 1/2 hours later, and we are thankful for it. But while it was out, we had a good time… (more…)

Fears of the Dreaded 18!

The other day, sweetie 2 came to me tearful about “growing up”.  “I don’t want to grow up!” “I like playing still!”  “Girls just want to talk now and wear makeup!”  “I want to play!” boo hoo hoo hoo…… 🙂 Poor Sweetie 2 was so conflicted.  You see, she is funny, and energetic and lovely!  She is mature in many… (more…)

Simple Ways To Change Scenery

I have written before about “Changing the Scenery” when a child gets stuck. Have you ever been in a situation where no matter what you tried: reasoning, rocking, talking, trying to soothe, saying you may not… didn’t work at all? I have.  And it can be frustrating! You are keeping calm, doing all the things you have learned to do,… (more…)

Give Me Give Me Give Me! I Want! I Want! I Need! I Need!

Give Me! Give Me! Give Me! I Want! I Want! I Need! I Need! I Need! (ORIGINALLY WRITTEN DECEMBER 08) If anybody has ever seen the Movie “What About Bob?” This is one of the famous lines from that movie that we all laugh about. There is this grown man, wanting something more from his psychiatrist than the man can… (more…)

Making Memories

In my last post I mentioned how Holidays can cause stress reactions in our children who have trauma backgrounds. We have found that one of the ways to reduce that stress is to plan for things that  the children can count on happening year after year. Simple things like getting the tree down at the same time each year, watching… (more…)

Happy Thanksgiving!

As many of you know, Thanksgiving and holidays in general can wreak havoc on the stability in your homes.  Out of the ordinary experiences can cause children who have trauma backgrounds to be dysregulated.  We have had holiday times where we wondered if we should celebrate as it seemed to cause our children stress. Those many years ago, we decided… (more…)


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