New Year, New Thoughts

new year thoughtIt has been an amazing year, and here we are in 2015! Where did the time go?  We had a wonderful holiday season, and will be celebrating Ukrainian/Russian Christmas, by having a traditional  meal on Wednesday evening, with dear friends.

I have had so many thoughts going through my head these past few weeks, but have not been able to form the words so that I could effectively share them!

I’m going to go ahead and give it a try, as  a few things are fresh on my mind.

I read a recent blog post by a fellow adoptive parent. It was a really nice post about how the Church can be helpful  towards families who have adopted or are fostering children.
I was upbeat about this post because she gave some very helpful information.
Then, I read some of the comments.  It wasn’t shocking that one of the comments was very negative. What shocked me was that it came from a very bitter sounding  fellow adoptive parent!
She diminished this woman’s post with critical words and observations that were over the top ridiculous.
The blogger did not have low standards for her children, but this person accused her, and any parent who has had a child who has struggled with being basically a bad parent!
Why?  She said she has raised 3 girls adopted from foster care and they are all fine and she had high standards and made them mind…blah blah blah…..she lost me.  She lost my respect.

I COULD have been that person, if the Lord had not brought our Sweetie 8 into our lives.  I could have been that person if the Lord had only given us 4 of our 8 children! 🙂
They were pretty easy!  And they all had trauma.  I could have said that allowing a child to wallow in the past is not helping them, or not making them straighten up is doing them a disservice! I could have said that if they didn’t discipline them, then the children would not do well and it would all be because of bad parenting!

I am SO THANKFUL for those other 4. And yes, some of them were home grown! 🙂
They are the ones who didn’t allow us to relax on our great parenting skills! They are the ones who challenged us to look deeper inside of ourselves and find that we too are seriously lacking, that we too need forgiveness, and that we too make mistakes!
They are the ones who have kept us on our knees and close to our Lord!  They are the ones who have experienced GREAT triumph and successes and have caused us to cheer those successes, truly appreciating each little step!
All of our children are deep thinkers, and feelers, they have blessed us in so many ways!
Parenting is a calling.  Adoption is too.
Even though we are called to be parents to our children, and we know that in a deep way, it does not mean that our path is easy.
It isn’t.  But it is RICH.  It is wonderful! And I wouldn’t have it any other way!

When our first son was born, I wanted to do everything right and make sure that he became the best person ever!  I found very quickly that being his mama was important, but I would not be the only influence in his life, and he might have different ideas than me. 🙂

Now having just 4 left at home, and almost 12 grand children, I have learned to relax a bit. 🙂  I am never going to be a perfect person.  But I do know that the Lord can use my imperfections, just as He  always has!  He chooses to work with imperfect humans and in the process, we all learn together and find the wisdom of God.

I am so glad that our church has been so supportive of us through thick and thin.  I am sure there are those who have watched some of the things we have been through and felt we were coddling, or giving in to bad behaviors or worse.  There will always be those.
But overall, we have felt the love of our brothers and sisters in Christ, and we have felt their prayers!

Parenting a child from a very hard place, is most certainly not for the faint of heart.  But it is so rewarding.  Watching Sweetie 4 begin once again to flourish, and to catapult to new heights is exciting!
It will be 4 years in March when she came home at 11 after 2 failed adoptions.  In that time she has learned SO much! And we have too!

Navigating through the teen years with 4 daughters is a challenge, but so fun!  I love my girls and I love seeing them blossom!

Thank you Lord for 2014.  And thank you Lord for what is to come in 2015.  My hope and peace are in Christ.

Comments warmly welcomed!


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