FREEWAY CHAOS and An Analogy

Freeway Chaos

Yes, this is my car.  It was clean when we left for the airport to pick up Becca’s mom, who is staying in Texas for 2 weeks.

On the way back from the airport, late at night, I might add, we drove right into a construction area!
We were like lemmings jumping off a cliff…. one car after the other, and we got stuck in the group!

A large truck was in front of us about 5 cars up, and we could not see any signs.  The one lane apparently split into two. The truck went into the construction area, and so did everybody else!

The signs were awful. Once you saw it, it said, “Road Closed” but it was between where the lanes split and impossible to tell unless you had a clear view.

Things got worse from there. Some folks tried to turn around… ON A FWY and go the other way.
Seriously??
We stayed put and a very grouchy fellow with lights flashing seemed to need to remind us that “This is a Construction zone!”  Well duh!

He told us to wait.  At this point there were 3 cars in front of me, and about 10 behind me.
He then started to lead us through the area.  Down, down, down, into a VERY SCARY area with large trucks and heavy equipment digging and putting huge chunks of cement into the trucks.
All of the sudden, the guy 3 cars up stopped and turned around.  We saw the truck do the same, so we started to do the same thinking it was a dead end.
Grouchy guy YELLS AT US…. STAY THERE!
Apparently the fellow in front of us decided not to follow the grouchy guy with the flashing lights.
Finally, a really nice fellow drove up with a big smile and said, “I’m going to stop everybody and I’ll come back to get you and lead you out of here. ”
So we waited. He came back and did just that.
Another mile through some really rough areas and then he drove up under a construction area with a lot of cement overhead.  He waved his arm like, “common’ it’s ok” and we drove up and out of there. He told us to have a nice night!
And we were SO THANKFUL!
Man that was scary!
My son’s mom in law thanked me for the adventure! LOL

Now I need to wash the car again.

So, what is this story doing on an adoption related blog….. WELL
I thought of an analogy. 🙂
I love analogies because they help us to see simple truths.

I was truly scared.  I followed into an area I KNEW I shouldn’t be.  It didn’t help for grouchy guy to remind me of that.  I remained scared and didn’t feel safe at all.  I wonder if the fellow who turned around panicked, feeling the same?  He didn’t TRUST that man.

But when the nice guy smiled, and gave us comforting words of “I’m going to lead you out of here”….. I was instantly relaxed.  I even felt there was a light at the end of the very dark tunnel we had gotten ourselves into.
He didn’t berate us for being little lemmings and following the other cars, and I didn’t feel the need to explain anything to him.
He led and we followed.
When he drove us to the area where we had to go under that bridge, I paused.  Instead of yelling, he signaled,  “Follow me! with his hand.  And I followed.  He didn’t send me somewhere without him going before me, letting me know we were safe.

I was so embarrassed about going into the construction area.  The first guy made me a little angry with his attitude.  The second guy just got the problem solved and made me trust him.

As parents, we can be the angry parent who points out our children’s flaws and mistakes.
OR  We can be the parent who gently says, “Follow me!”
“I’ll help you out of this!”

I had to follow;  he didn’t drag me or carry me through.  But he gave me a desire to follow.
With our children, we can give them a desire to listen and follow just by our welcoming tone and care for them.

When we make our children feel that they have value as human beings, and that we are not judging them, they will follow our lead.

Model to your children how you want them to be. Give them grace; they will truly appreciate it.
They don’t need to hear, “Look what you did!”
They need to hear, “It’s ok, let’s fix this.”

You can help them solve their problems, without abandoning  them with no direction.
Your children need you to calmly take the lead.

Comments warmly welcomed!

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